Buch lesen: «Rescuing Dr Macallister»

Rescuing Dr MacAllister

Sarah Morgan

www.millsandboon.co.uk

PROLOGUE

HE HATED hospitals.

Ben MacAllister stared at the bold red sign for the Accident and Emergency unit and wondered what on earth had possessed him to take the job. It had been a moment of weakness and one which he was already bitterly regretting.

What the hell had he been thinking of?

He could have stayed in the clinic in Pakistan where they were desperate for doctors with his skills, or he could have done what he’d been promising himself for ages and taken a year off and travelled.

In fact, he’d had any number of options, all of which were considerably more appealing than the one that he’d chosen.

With an impatient sigh, he strode across the car park to the entrance. If he didn’t get himself inside the building soon he’d be climbing back into the car and driving back the way he’d come.

Forcing himself to move, he strode through the swing doors and stopped dead as the memories came rushing back. The smells, the noise, the bustle...

That one awful day that had changed his life.

Sweat broke out on his brow and he gritted his teeth to stop himself running.

This was never going to work.

He was about to turn and go back the way he’d come when his oldest friend came striding through the swing doors towards him, a stethoscope looped round his neck like a tame serpent.

‘Ben—great to see you!’

‘Nicholson.’ He clasped the hand that was offered, aware that his brief chance for escape had vanished. ‘How are you?’

‘Relieved to see you.’ Sean Nicholson shot a telling glance towards the crowded waiting room. ‘Where do they all come from? I’m trying to run this department with zero staff at the moment so you’re as welcome as alcohol on a stag night. Let’s go to my office and talk.’

Ben reluctantly kept pace as the other man led him down the corridor into a small office which over-looked the car park and the mountains beyond.

Sean waved a hand at a chair buried under a mound of papers. ‘Move those files and sit down.’

‘I’d rather stand.’ Ben paced over to the window and stared outside, feeling some of the tension in his body dissipate as he stared at the snow-capped mountains. It always soothed him to be in the mountains. It was a reminder that there was a world outside if things got too bad within the hospital. ‘Nice view.’

Sean smiled. ‘Being the senior consultant comes with some perks. It’s not the Himalayas, but we like it.’ His smile faded. ‘You stayed away too long. You look like hell, MacAllister.’

‘Thanks.’ He should have been offended by Sean’s blunt comment, but he wasn’t. After all, it was true. He did look like hell.

And he didn’t want to be here. It wasn’t going to work.

Sean’s voice was rough but there was sympathy in his blue eyes. ‘You needed to come back, Ben, and you know it.’

‘Is that what this is all about? Rehabilitation?’ Ben’s tone was weary and his mouth tightened. ‘When you called, you told me that you were desperate for doctors.’

‘I am desperate,’ Sean said calmly. ‘You have no idea just how desperate I am. I’m trying to run a department on fresh air at the moment. Having you here helps alleviate the problem and it makes my wife feel better.’

The expression in Ben’s eyes softened slightly at the mention of Sean’s wife. ‘How is Ally?’

‘Worried about you,’ Sean said frankly. ‘She wants you close by so that she can help.’

Ben’s expression was unreadable. ‘So basically you’re interfering?’

‘Well, it’s time someone did.’ Sean met his accusing gaze head on. ‘It’s been two years, Ben.’

‘And what’s that supposed to mean?’ Ben’s eyes glittered dangerously. ‘Is two years some sort of magic figure? Am I supposed to feel better just because it’s been two years?’

Sean sighed. ‘No. But it’s time you stopped running.’ He hesitated. ‘And maybe it’s time you talked about what happened.’

‘Why the hell would I want to do that?’

Sean looked him in the eye. ‘Because sometimes it helps to talk?’

Ben threw back his head and laughed. ‘That’s rich, coming from you! When have you ever talked about your feelings?’

Sean rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. ‘I talk to Ally.’

Ben lifted an eyebrow. ‘You’re offering to lend me your wife?’

‘I’m offering to lend you her listening skills. Ally wants you to come and spend some time with us.’

Ben’s mouth tightened. ‘You can tell Ally not to meddle.’ But he knew she meant well. He was very fond of Sean’s wife who was mature and sensible and knew exactly what she wanted out of life.

Unlike some women.

‘You can tell her yourself,’ Sean said crisply. ‘She wants you to come to dinner as soon as you’re settled in.’

Ben digested this information. ‘Don’t tell me— she’s inviting a spare woman?’

Sean fiddled with some papers on his desk and avoided eye contact. ‘I’m not involved with the guest list. I just turn up and eat the food.’

‘Sean!’ Ben’s tone held a warning note and Sean sighed and raked a hand through his hair.

‘All right, there’s a possibility that she’s match-making...’

‘Possibility?’

Sean shifted uncomfortably. ‘Probability. You know Ally.’ He gave a shrug. ‘It doesn’t mean anything.’

Ben gritted his teeth. He had no intention of being set up. ‘Forget it.’

Sean sighed. ‘It’s only dinner! Dinner, and one available woman to talk to. It’s not as if you hate women—or are you trying to tell me that you’ve been celibate for the past two years?’

Ben chose to ignore that question.

‘I’m not interested.’

‘Oh, come on!’ Sean gave a disbelieving look. ‘I knew you in medical school remember? Women get cricked necks when you pass them in the street. You had more girlfriends than—’

‘That was a long time ago.’ Ben interrupted him with a grim expression on his face. ‘Things have changed.’

He’d changed.

Sean’s look spoke volumes. ‘You’re seriously trying to tell me that you haven’t been with a woman for two years?’

Ben’s dark brows settled into an ominous frown. ‘What business is that of yours?’

‘I’m your friend,’ Sean reminded him, ‘and I want to see you get your life back together. Maybe it would help to meet a decent woman and—’

‘Sean, listen to me.’ Ben’s voice was tired. ‘I know you think women solve everything, but in my case you’re wrong. My life is fine and I’m certainly not a good deal for any decent woman.’

Sean looked genuinely bemused. ‘Well, why the hell not? According to Ally, you’re stunningly good-looking—’ He broke off as he considered the implications of what he’d just said. ‘I grilled her over that, by the way. I’m not at all keen on the fact my wife freely admits to finding you irresistible.’ He shook himself slightly. ‘Anyway, that aside, apparently you’re the original macho action man and women love that, you’ve got money, you—’

‘I never realised you felt this way about me.’ Ben’s tone was dry and his friend waved a hand.

‘Relax. I prefer blondes. You’re not my type.’

Ben gave a short laugh. ‘I’m not anybody’s type. Not if they’ve got any sense. I don’t have anything to offer anyone. I’m not claiming to have lived like a monk, but I can honestly say that I haven’t felt anything for a woman for two years.’

And he doubted whether he’d ever feel anything again. It was as if he was dead inside. Even the few flings he’d had hadn’t really worked for him. Usually because the woman he was with so obviously wanted more than he was able to give.

Which was nothing more than brief physical satisfaction.

Sean looked at him. ‘Give it time. It’s grief that makes you feel that way.’

Grief?

Sean made it sound so simple, but Ben knew that it was so much more than grief that had locked his emotions inside himself. It was anger, too. Anger and bitterness and guilt.

Oh, yes, definitely guilt.

But Sean didn’t know any of that, of course, and why should he? Ben wasn’t in the habit of discussing his feelings with anyone. What was the point? It wouldn’t change what had happened.

And as for giving it time—well, it had been two years already. He’d given it more than enough time and nothing had changed. He still felt the same way as he had when it had first happened. As far as he was concerned, time had healed nothing.

‘How was Pakistan?’ Sean changed the subject neatly and Ben accepted the change readily.

‘Interesting. Challenging. Hard work.’

‘Good.’ Sean nodded briskly. ‘A bit like the job here, then.’

The job.

Ben opened his mouth to say that he didn’t think he could do it but the words didn’t come out the way he’d planned. ‘So when do you want me to start?’

He listened to himself and almost laughed.

What was he saying? Was he crazy?

He didn’t want to start at all. He wanted to turn around and walk out of the department the way he’d come without bothering to look back. Not submit himself to torture.

On the other hand, maybe it was time to face his demons.

‘You saw the waiting room. How about now?’ Sean gave a wry smile and fingered the stethoscope around his neck. ‘Only joking. The day after tomorrow will do fine. That should give you time to settle into the place I’ve found for you to live. It’s great. You’ll love it.’ He reached into his drawer and pulled out a set of keys and a map. ‘A log cabin in a forest. It’s easy enough to find but watch the roads. The weather has been filthy for almost twenty-four hours and there’s no sign of it letting up. Some of the roads are flooded and there are trees down, so go easy.’

Ben glanced out of the window. ‘After some of the roads in Pakistan—or rather the lack of them—I can cope with the Lake District. But I’m in no hurry, Sean. Why don’t you show me round while I’m here and then I can get straight on with it the day after tomorrow?’

‘You’re not dying to go and clean up?’

Ben rubbed long fingers over his roughened jaw and lifted an eyebrow. ‘Am I that bad?’

Sean looked him over. ‘Let’s just say I can tell you’ve been in the wilds for the last year. You’re what Ally would call rugged.’ He stood up and walked towards the door. ‘Do me a favour and lose the designer stubble and some of your hair before you start or the hospital management will be complaining.’

Irritated by what he saw as a complete irrelevance, Ben’s face darkened. ‘I thought you took me on for my medical skills, not my appearance.’

Sean held the door open for him to pass. ‘I did. But the way you look at the moment you’ll scare the patients.’ He gave a wicked smile and locked the door behind them. ‘Unless they’re female. You’ll also distract my nurses and they’re too busy for that. I want their minds on work, not sex.’

Ben shot him an exasperated look. ‘Why did I ever agree to help you out?’

Sean slapped him on the shoulder as they walked into the corridor. ‘Because I’m your best mate and you’d never let me down?’

Ben shook his head. ‘Because I’m an idiot.’ He stopped dead and stared at his friend. ‘I can’t promise you that this will work—you know that, don’t you?’

Sean hesitated and then nodded reluctantly. ‘Just promise me you’ll give it a few months at least.’

A few months?

Ben felt sick at the thought. At the moment he doubted his ability to get through the next few minutes, let alone a few months.

He should never have taken the job.

CHAPTER ONE

IT WAS a filthy night and the river was flooded.

Ellie stopped the car and stared in dismay at the murky dark water swirling directly in her path, illuminated by the beam of her headlights. In the summer months the river flowed obediently under the road, but in the winter, particularly after torrential rain, it swelled and burst its banks, flooding the road and forcing drivers to make a long detour through another valley.

But she didn’t have time for any sort of detour.

Lindsay was in labour. On her own and terrified in a farmhouse that was in the middle of nowhere.

Ellie flicked her windscreen wipers onto double speed and weighed her options.

Turn around and approach Lindsay’s farm from the other side of the valley?

No. She dismissed the thought instantly. It would take too much time and time was the one thing she didn’t have.

Which left only one other option.

She narrowed her eyes and stared through the darkness at the swirling water.

‘Oh, for goodness’ sake, Lindsay!’ She glared at the surging river as if sheer will-power could make the waters part like the Red Sea. ‘Why did you have to buy a house in such a remote place? What was wrong with a nice stone cottage in the middle of Ambleside?’

Apparently the midwife had been very relaxed and reassuring on the phone, reminding her that the baby wasn’t due for another four weeks and that the tightenings that Lindsay was feeling were probably normal.

Ellie peered at the swirling water and hoped the midwife knew what she was talking about. If she was wrong, Ellie would have to deliver the baby by herself, a challenge which she didn’t relish. She was an A and E nurse, not a midwife.

In fact, if it hadn’t been for Lindsay’s cry for help, Ellie would have gone back to work because you didn’t need to be a genius to know that the A and E department was going to be packed with injuries on a night like this.

Opening the car door, she flinched as a gust of wind tore it out of her hand and the rain flung itself in her face like water from a bucket.

‘Ugh...’ Gasping and scrubbing the water away from her eyes with her hand, she forced the car door shut and picked her way down to the edge of the water. Within minutes she was soaked, the pelting rain turning her long dark hair as sleek as an otter’s, her dark lashes clogging together as she tried to see through the darkness.

How deep could it be?

She’d driven this way only the day before and the road had been clear. It had been raining for twenty-four hours but surely the water level couldn’t have risen that fast?

The secret was to drive quickly and not hesitate.

She’d done it before in her youth, she reminded herself. Plenty of times.

Her mind made up, she hurried back to the car and scraped a hank of sodden hair away from her face.

Now that she’d made her decision, her eyes gleamed with anticipation and she started the engine, set her jaw and pressed the accelerator to the floor.

As she hit the water the car jerked and for one terrifying, breath-stealing moment she thought she was going to be stranded in the middle of the roaring river. And then she heard the engine splutter and the car suddenly surged forward and bounded out the other side as if it was relieved to be clear of the water.

She gave a whoop of triumph which turned to a groan as the car gave another splutter, choked and then stopped.

‘Oh, no—don’t do this to me.’ She turned the key again but there was no response.

Her little car might have made it through the ford but there was no way it was going any further. She flopped back in her seat and stared out of the windscreen in dismay.

Now what?

All her thoughts were on Lindsay, alone, afraid and possibly in labour less than a mile away.

Lindsay—not just her cousin but her best friend.

There was no way anything was going to stop her reaching her.

Which meant she was going to have to walk the rest of the way.

But at least now she was on the right side of the water. She’d just have to leave the car where it was and sort it out later.

Reaching into the back of her car for her coat, she dragged it on, grabbed her bag and opened the car door again, bracing herself as she confronted the elements.

If anything the rain had increased and in seconds she was drenched to the skin, her vision distorted by the volume of water streaming over her face. The wind was so fierce she could hardly stand, let alone make headway up the road, and she swore under her breath as she battled to stay upright.

She’d barely made any progress when she heard the unmistakable sound of a car engine from behind her. Turning quickly, she saw headlights flickering in the darkness as another car made its way towards the ford.

For a moment she tensed. The water was deeper than it looked, but there was no way of warning the driver. She just hoped he wouldn’t suffer the same fate that she had.

He didn’t.

Ellie watched enviously as the car surged through the water without any alteration in speed and then leapt out the other side as if it had barely noticed the impediment. Great. What wouldn’t she have given for a car like that on a night like this?

Still, she might be able to make use of it.

Ignoring the fact that the wind was trying to tear her coat from her shoulders, she braced her legs apart, stood in the middle of the road and windmilled her arms.

Oh, please, please, let the driver stop.

If the driver could drop her at the end of Lindsay’s lane, she’d save precious time.

The car pulled up and there was a soft purr as the window on the passenger side slid down.

The wind whipped her sodden hair across her face and she raked it to one side impatiently as she leaned inside to talk to the driver.

‘Thank goodness you stopped!’ She was shouting to make herself heard above the wind. ‘I need a lift, it’s an emergency.’

Without waiting for an invitation, she yanked open the door and clambered into the passenger seat, giving an exclamation of disgust as the wind tried to drag the door from her hand.

With considerable difficulty she slammed it shut, closed the electric window and turned to the driver with a relieved smile.

‘What a night! Thank goodness you came along when you did. I was in a spot of bother.’

There was an ominous silence and in the darkness the driver’s features were barely visible. When he finally spoke, his voice had a hard edge. ‘Do you have a death wish?’

The temperature inside the car suddenly seemed lower than outside, and Ellie’s merry smile faltered slightly as she looked into glittering black eyes.

‘Of course I don’t have a death wish.’

‘You took an absurd risk.’

‘By driving through the ford?’ She gave a chuckle and toed off her wet shoes. ‘I hate to point out the obvious, but you drove through it, too!’

‘In a vehicle designed for those sorts of conditions,’ he growled. ‘The same can’t be said for your car.’

‘Wasn’t she amazing?’ Ellie squinted through clogged lashes towards her little car, her tone warm with affection. ‘I mean, I know she conked out on me but at least she made it through the water.’

‘You could have been killed.’

‘Relax, will you?’ She smiled cheerfully as she peeled off her soaking wet coat and pulled her sodden jumper over her head. ‘I’ve got nine lives.’

‘Not any more.’ His voice was clipped. ‘You just lost at least three back there in the river.’

Why was he so angry?

‘I’ve been driving through that ford since I was young, although admittedly I haven’t done it for a while now. There was no danger.’

She dropped her wet clothes onto the floor of the car and tugged her wet shirt out of her trousers.

‘Are you planning to remove all your clothes?’

‘Just the outer layers,’ she assured him. ‘I’m soaked to the skin and I don’t want to get hypothermia. What I really need is a towel. I don’t suppose...?’ Her voice trailed off as she saw the expression in his eyes. ‘No, you’re not the type to carry a towel in the car.’

He seemed to struggle to find his voice. ‘I don’t generally need towels when I drive,’ he said finally, and she rubbed her arms to keep warm.

‘Well, you should,’ she told him. ‘They can be very useful. I remember one time when I was driving home from work, I passed this injured sheep—’

He blinked in disbelief. ‘Sheep?’

‘Yes, sheep.’ She gave him an odd look and then shrugged and carried on. ‘Anyway, she’d managed to wriggle her way under the barbed-wire fence and she was totally wedged and every time she moved the wire embedded itself deeper in her wool and— why are you looking at me like that?’

‘I’ve never met anyone that talks as much as you. I’m wondering when you breathe.’

‘I can breathe and talk,’ she assured him. ‘As I was saying, she was stuck, and I’ve tried rescuing sheep with bare hands before and it’s always been a disaster, but luckily I had a towel in my car and so I used that and it was brilliant. I always carry one now. You should too.’

He stared at her for a long time and then finally stirred and cleared his throat. ‘I’ll remember that. In the meantime, I do have a blanket on the back seat. Please feel free to use it.’

‘Oh, thanks.’ Completely unselfconscious, Ellie reached into the back, grabbed the blanket and then shook herself like a drenched kitten. Droplets of water flew from her dark hair and landed on the driver. ‘Gosh, I’m soaked and freezing. Can we turn your heating up?’

‘Be my guest.’

She glanced at him warily as she fiddled with the controls of his fancy car.

‘You’re looking at me in a funny way. I suppose you think I’m very forward, but I’m sure you wouldn’t want me to get hypothermia. I remember once when I got really wet—’

‘Do you always talk this much?’

‘Are you always this tense?’ She peered at him, trying to read his expression in the semi-darkness. ‘Have I made you late or something? It was very kind of you to stop.’

‘You were standing in the middle of the road,’ he reminded her with exaggerated patience. ‘I had no choice but to stop. It was that or run you over.’

‘If you’re trying to convince me that given the choice you would have driven past me and left me there, you won’t succeed,’ she said cheerfully. ‘No one would be that heartless.’

There was a long pause and when he finally spoke his tone was chilly. ‘You have a worrying faith in human nature.’

She frowned. ‘No, I haven’t. Most people are very kind-hearted. Like you. I don’t know what I would have done if you hadn’t come along when you did. You’re my knight in shining armour and I’ll love you forever.’ She snuggled under the blanket and gave him a wide smile which faltered when she saw the look on his face. ‘What? Why are you looking at me like that? What have I done now?’

In the gloom his expression was hard to read but she sensed his exasperation.

‘Are you always this reckless?’

‘Reckless?’ She subdued a yawn and snuggled deeper under the blanket. ‘When was I reckless?’

‘When?’ He lifted one dark eyebrow and his expression was ironic. ‘Well, let’s see—was it when you drove the ford in a car no bigger than a sewing machine, or flagged down a total stranger, climbed into his car, stripped off your clothes and declared undying love—’

‘Not undying love exactly,’ Ellie corrected him with a quick frown. ‘More eternal thanks.’

He gritted his teeth. ‘You’re not safe to be let out alone. Didn’t your father teach you never to accept lifts from strange men?’

For a brief moment Ellie’s smile faltered. ‘Yes,’ she said in a small voice, ‘I suppose he did.’

‘So what were you doing, flagging down a total stranger?’

‘Well, it was that or die of exposure,’ Ellie said logically, pushing away thoughts of her beloved father. ‘Dad may have taught me not to accept lifts from strange men, but he also taught me to use my head in a crisis. And tonight is definitely a crisis.’

‘I could be anyone.’ His voice had a hard edge, but Ellie just smiled trustingly and snuggled further under the blanket.

‘I’m sure you’re a lovely person. In my experience, most people are.’

‘Then you obviously haven’t had much experience,’ he said roughly. ‘How old are you?’

He flicked on the internal light and she blinked.

‘You shouldn’t ask a woman her age. It isn’t polite. And you shouldn’t be influenced by appearances.’ Ellie’s voice tailed off as she saw him properly for the first time.

As their eyes met her breath jammed in her throat and her mouth fell open.

Wow.

The man was stunning. Seriously, breathtakingly good-looking.

She knew she was staring but she couldn’t help it. What woman wouldn’t stare when confronted by a man like this one?

His hair was too long and there was at least two days’ growth of stubble around his jaw, but never in her life had she been faced with a vision of such raw, untamed masculinity. Her eyes feasted slowly on the lean perfection of his face, the bold, dark eyebrows and firm, unsmiling mouth.

A long silence stretched between them and finally he spoke. ‘What’s the matter?’ His tone was rough. ‘Now that you’ve seen me properly, are you finally thinking that you might have been foolish to climb into my car?’

‘No.’ She shook herself and smiled at him, incurably honest. ‘Actually, I was thinking that when women kiss you, they probably keep their eyes open.’

He seemed to have lost his powers of speech and she tilted her head to one side and looked at him curiously.

‘What’s the matter? I’m just saying that you’re so good-looking it would be a terrible waste to close your eyes.’ She gave an impish smile and he shot her a look of pure, undiluted disbelief.

‘Do you always say exactly what’s in your head without any thought for the consequences?’

‘Always,’ she confessed. ‘I can’t stand people who say one thing and mean another. And don’t tell me no one’s ever told you you’re good-looking before. You must have heard it a million times.’

He studied her, not a flicker of expression on his handsome face. ‘Not in these circumstances.’

‘You’re shocked, aren’t you? But I don’t see why. You must know you’re good-looking.’ She shrugged. ‘It’s no big deal. Just a statement of fact. Like saying it’s raining.’

‘Raining...’ He gave her an odd look. ‘Right.’

‘Well, at the end of the day looks aren’t important, are they?’ she said simply. ‘Being with a person is about loving them for what’s inside, not for what’s outside.’

His dark eyes gleamed strangely in the darkness. ‘Absolutely.’

Ellie wriggled down in the seat and placed her feet on the heater to warm them. ‘I mean, someone can be rich and good-looking but what use is that if they’re no fun to be with?’

‘What use indeed?’ His eyes narrowed slightly as he watched her antics from his side of the car. ‘Are you sure you’re quite comfortable?’

‘Perfectly, thank you.’ She beamed at him happily, ignoring the sarcasm in his tone. ‘I’m still pretty cold but this is a great car. Your heater is very efficient.’