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Ира Шилова
Не ешь меня

Однажды в наших краях построят огромный Дом. В нём будет тысяча комнат и миллион кроваток. А спать в них будут ребятишки, которых приведут мамы и папы на воспитание. Странное, конечно, это дело. Отчего бы родителям самим не наставлять своих детей? Мамы и папы будут много работать? Или они увлекутся поисками сокровищ? Или захотят научиться фокусам и запишутся на уроки по вытаскиванию кроликов из шляп? Увы, нет, нет и нет. Всё куда страшней. В грядущие времена мамы и папы разучатся воспитывать ребятишек, поэтому Дом и станет ценнее безоблачного детства.

Чтобы ребятишки превращались в хороших взрослых, в Доме придумают такую штуку: станут зашивать в детские головки пушинки под названием «В.О.Л.К.». Что полностью читается, как «Великое Обслуживание Людских Капризов». Детишки вместо скучных нянек получат всезнающего друга. Что тут плохого? Но нечто скверное в таком порядке всё же заведётся. Потому как после «В.О.Л.К.а.» люди постепенно, окончательно и точно вымрут.

Но подождите, не пугайтесь. Возможно, ничего такого не случится! Смотрите, в большущий Дом приводят девочку. С виду обычную, тоненькую, в красной шапочке. Дом радостно зашивает под эту шапочку «В.О.Л.К.а», и воспитание девочки начинается.

В первый день она получает прозвище. Его дают ей ребята, которые уже долго пожили с «В.О.Л.К.О.м» в голове. Они, не поговорив с девочкой, не рассмотрев её получше, нарекают её просто Красной Шапочкой. Что первое на ней заметили, то и приняли за человека.

– Красная так красная, – думает девочка, – Шапочка так Шапочка. Я-то знаю, кто я на самом деле.

Проходят первые особенно трудные недели Красной Шапочки в Доме, и она признаётся вслух:

– Да я без «В.О.Л.К.а.» и дня не проживу!

И это правда. Потому что в Доме маленькой Красной Шапочке никто не помогает ни с заправкой кровати, ни с чисткой зубов, ни даже с тем, как есть манную кашу, не задевая комочков. И если Красная Шапочка не спрашивала бы советов у «В.О.Л.К.а», то непременно, неизбежно, совершенно точно решила бы, что она как-никак – пробка. И место ей не среди людей, а в бутылке со звёздной пылью. Загрустила бы тогда Красная Шапочка и исчезла. Но «В.О.Л.К.» услужливо вкладывает в девичью головку советы, и никаких пропаж малюток не приключается. С «В.О.Л.К.ом» Красной Шапочке живётся в Доме бесхлопотно.

Пролетают месяцы, и Красная Шапочка рассуждает так:

– А «В.О.Л.К.» не только полезный, он ещё невозможно увлекательный!

И это тоже правда. Всем ребятишкам Дома хочется обращаться к «В.О.Л.К.у» снова и снова, ибо у него полно историй на любой вкус. Про единорогов, пиратов, великанов, про хоровое пение и толкание ядра. Если бы не «В.О.Л.К.» Красная Шапочка ещё долго не прознала бы о том, что её любимые рассказы – про хлебобулочные изделия. Девочка так ими вдохновляется, что и сама начинает выпекать пухлые булочки. Красная Шапочка печёт себе друга из дрожжевого теста, черники и честности, а называет его – Пирожок.

Ира ШиловаНе ешь меня

Ира Шилова
Не ешь меня